Seasonal Depression, AI Bot Cheating, & Sibling Banter | Mental Health Discussion

00:02.21
Bruce Anthony
Welcome First of all welcome this is unsolicited perspectives and I'm your host Bruce Anthony it's the sibling happy hour and I'm here with my sister Jay Andrea we're gonna be dely daddling a little bit then we're gonna be talking about seasonal depression and then we're gonna finish off with. Men cheating with Ai bots on Instagram I don't know sounds interesting but first things first.

00:32.10
Bruce Anthony
What obsess I can't call it I'm just chilling I'm finally no longer high anymore. What's up we kid who shout out to our father terror 65

00:33.60
J. Aundrea
What up bretta.

00:39.80
J. Aundrea
Yeah, quite a weekend.

00:47.30
J. Aundrea
Yes, yes, it was quiet was quite a quite a some festivities.

00:52.30
Bruce Anthony
Yeah, you had some gummies that that did me in on on Friday that's because I was trying to keep up with you and that was stupid.

00:57.80
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

01:03.22
J. Aundrea
Yeah, now that wouldn't have done that I wouldn't have done that. Yeah.

01:06.72
Bruce Anthony
It like I wouldn't try to care but with me look you did 3 gummies I was like oh I would do one and then after an hour and a half I was like well not feeling nothing. Let me do another one and two hours after that.

01:19.21
J. Aundrea
That was your fatal mistake.

01:24.69
Bruce Anthony
I was crawling to the I was crawling out of the shower and to the bed. Yeah.

01:26.44
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah, that's your fatal mistake. That's that's everybody's mistake is that they go I say nothing and that's a mistake it is something It will always always be something so just whenever you get that thought.

01:37.65
Bruce Anthony
And then it is um, good.

01:46.53
J. Aundrea
Don't go with it just hold on for a little longer. Just.

01:47.71
Bruce Anthony
Don't go with it. Yeah, just hold on just hold on I don't know if I'm a do a edible tonight is be too late to do it edible tonight. So I'm not gonna do eible Tonightpe We had fun. You know ah took a dad the top golf into a winery at think he had a good time.

02:00.40
J. Aundrea
Yeah, top golf is now my whole personality I'm that person I'm gonna be that person of like you ever did you ever have you ever done top golf. You've never done top golf. You've never done top golf come on.

02:06.92
Bruce Anthony
It.

02:14.46
Bruce Anthony
Now Let's let's let's explain to the people out there. Why all of a sudden you're a fan of top off.

02:19.85
J. Aundrea
Yeah, because I'm a winner. Um, all I do is win when when no matter what ah got top golf on my mind and I can never get enough that is how us who I am I'm a winner at.

02:28.49
Bruce Anthony
Um, okay.

02:34.45
Bruce Anthony
For those people that don't understand what top golf is is basically a driving range where there's a point system if you hit these hit these targets now here's the problem. There were 5 people playing.

02:42.18
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah.

02:49.49
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

02:51.57
Bruce Anthony
And you're supposed to choose yourself on the monitor before you start to swing and so often people forgot to choose themselves so you got a lot of points that weren't even yours the majority note the majority of the points that you got.

02:58.61
J. Aundrea
Um, right because I was already in first place.

03:08.41
J. Aundrea
No incorrect I hit that I hit so many targets incorrect and you're just upset because you got up there like this was the pga tournament you took 45 minutes to take 1 swing only to miss. Yes, it is. You took.

03:10.20
Bruce Anthony
Were not yours.

03:23.15
Bruce Anthony
Um, that's not true. That's not true. No okay.

03:28.20
J. Aundrea
So many practice swings. It is ridiculous and you got up there and you were very serious about it. You were you weren't even smiling you were zoomed in you. Yeah, you were just like this is real. You were planned for the for the green jacket and it it you missed and you.

03:35.74
Bruce Anthony
I.

03:44.97
Bruce Anthony
Hold on that's okay, a lot of what you said is not true right now. First of all, first of all first of all I I was having fun and I was smiling. Yeah if i.

03:46.61
J. Aundrea
Punk that was.

03:51.90
J. Aundrea
It is so true. No, you weren't you you got it when you get up to the T first where you got up to the T You are so.

04:04.26
Bruce Anthony
Is hold on that hold on.

04:07.97
J. Aundrea
Dead serious it was It wasn't even like was like a joke you were dead serious and I was like was you look so serious. We're literally just eating chicken tenders and taking golf swings. You looked so serious.

04:22.24
Bruce Anthony
Hold on now I story I wasn't in last place I wasn't in last place I was in second place for the longest. Okay i.

04:26.64
J. Aundrea
And you kept trying to give everyone pointers and I'm like you're in last place who are you giving pointers to ah but who were you giving pointers to is you act like you're a golf pro.

04:40.69
Bruce Anthony
Because people weren't people Well people didn't know how to hold the Gu of the club right? They didn't know how to swing and and all at and a hold on I was handicapped. That's first and foremost I was handicapped because my jeans was too. My jeans was too tight.

04:50.70
J. Aundrea
In what way nobody told you.

04:55.43
Bruce Anthony
And I was wearing my Jordans and and I couldn't really get a good grip on my Jordans and my feet were hurting. Yeah, but I didn't think it we was going I thought we was just gonna have some fun and but you started talking trash and I was like I got to I got to show up and show out.

04:58.31
J. Aundrea
You knew where we were going.

05:06.43
J. Aundrea
The only reason that I started talker trash is because you got they're trying to educate everybody like you were a golf c pro and I'm like bro just Sni down.

05:15.23
Bruce Anthony
But I had been taught all right I had been taught by a golf pro the first the first time I ever picked up a club a club a golf pro was instructing me now. Granted I have not swung a club in 12 years but you know what? but you know what that second swing.

05:28.26
J. Aundrea
Right.

05:33.59
Bruce Anthony
Was beautiful.

05:35.40
J. Aundrea
You had 1 lesson twelve years ago and you the the condescending way you explained a driver versus an ire to me was annoying as hell as my ah.

05:37.54
Bruce Anthony
But I was a natural I had to how is it kind ofcending I was just saying like this is a driver this for long didn't say that like death.

05:51.34
J. Aundrea
Is a driver but it was so annoying saws like I have to win like I have to.

05:56.42
Bruce Anthony
But but you got to also admit like the game was cheat me because they didn't give me a lot of the points that I deserve to have no.

06:06.62
J. Aundrea
No, you didn't hit the Target listen. No no, if.

06:10.91
Bruce Anthony
No I was actually hitting the Target y'all were hitting and the grass and it was rolling into the Target I was popping it but it was it would it was sound like this when I it would go but and I was popping it and it would go at the target and I'm like yo. Where's my points and they wouldn't give me my points.

06:23.53
J. Aundrea
If if the net at the edge of the range was the target then you were hitting it that did.

06:28.43
Bruce Anthony
That was one time that was one time I did that? no that was one time I did that and and technically for the record I still drove the ball. The furthest than anybody else. Yeah.

06:41.33
J. Aundrea
Now our our brother got it the farthest he ended up getting 16 points on 1 and he hit he hit a target all the way in a back. It was a jew like it wasn't jew like I don't know house. Yeah.

06:49.39
Bruce Anthony
Did he he he was making me so mad because he would just go up there and he would just swing and I was like that's not how you swing a go club is he was like it's working I I wanted to fight I Want to fight everybody so badly because y'all weren't playing right.

07:00.58
J. Aundrea
Yes, it is this slaves and gentlemen. This is how serious this is how serious he got and we even we weren't playing right? we were playing it was play we were this was this is not the Pga tour. We were just.

07:09.31
Bruce Anthony
I.

07:17.35
Bruce Anthony
Look It was real life. It was real life I guarantee you I guarantee I guarantee you next time we come back in town. We go on the top golf I don't give a damn if it's snowing outside. We're gonna go to top golf and we gonna run this back. Also I I had had like.

07:18.74
J. Aundrea
Playing There were no rules that it was not real life. It was not real life. It was for play play.

07:30.85
J. Aundrea
Ah I'm I'm ready I'm ready any time here. Go here. Go the excuses What that got the it was not hot. It was cooled out. It was like.

07:36.51
Bruce Anthony
5 tequila and sodas. Well I was I was it was hot. It was hot and I thought it was I thought it was gonna be cooler and I had a sweatshirt on and I was sweating and I accidentally grabbed the woman's club so it was throwing me off.

07:48.41
J. Aundrea
° it was a beautiful day. Ah, a lot of excuses what you did that you did you did led you.

07:56.30
Bruce Anthony
Bunch of bunch of a I tell you 1 thing I did though I dropped a hundred a dad's pop shot I did.

08:07.74
J. Aundrea
Ladieser gentlemen he did drop a hundred points on the pop shot that you took a picture that I was there for that I have I will give you your props for that because I think the most irish guy was 12 Yeah.

08:13.44
Bruce Anthony
Right? And for y'all that don't know pop shot. It's the little basketball video game where you actually shooting the ball in the rim and you got a certain amount of time. Yeah I dropped 100 points y'all and it wasn't unlimited time. It was timed.

08:28.90
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah, no, you were shooting it. Yeah yeah, so you gonna find the 1 one thing you did and you go.

08:32.41
Bruce Anthony
I dropped a hundred and them. Thanks y'all and it wasn't like I was just standing up dropping the ball because I'm tall now I was shooting that thing and it was hitting nothing but that yeah yeah I was out there doing that they so it was a good time. It was a good time. What else is yeah look I took a lot of as that day.

08:47.49
J. Aundrea
Take that and you are working with it. But that's okay.

08:51.97
Bruce Anthony
Okay, yeah, that's like a lot of else between not doing what I thought I was gonna do at top golf and being so high so hit on the ride I was gonna leave this for after hours onensor but I'll tell a little bit about it on the ride home because my friend came and picked me up.

08:58.16
J. Aundrea
M.

09:06.10
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah, yes.

09:10.63
Bruce Anthony
To get me a ride back home. Thank you for that because that is 45 minutes out of her way to pick me up and and to to drive me to my place right before we're about to hit four ninety five so ladies and gentlemen we live in Washington d c area. My dad.

09:15.45
J. Aundrea
Right.

09:30.00
Bruce Anthony
Lives in this area that uses this road called two 70 this intersection that's called two seventy and emerges on the four ninety five that'll take you into Dc when you get off a two seventy and you go to four ninety five after you pass this last exit.

09:38.13
J. Aundrea
And.

09:47.32
Bruce Anthony
Ah, there are no more exits on four ninety five you just got to wait twenty five thirty minutes before you can get to any like place that's like a gas station or like that before we got off a to 70 as we ran down to 70

09:48.63
J. Aundrea
For.

09:56.45
J. Aundrea
Right.

10:05.20
Bruce Anthony
I got so cotton mouth I was like I don't think I'm gonna make it in life. That's not not tonight in life because it felt like 1 if I opened my mouth it like really hurt in my mouth I was so parched so I took my friend eyes like look.

10:07.41
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

10:20.28
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah.

10:24.49
Bruce Anthony
I don't know what we gotta do but I got I got to pull over it and I gotta get some water because I'm dying over here I'll tell the story of me pulling over trying to find water later but eventually I found 2 bottles of water and guzzled them and it still wasn't enough I came home drinking a jug of water.

10:26.86
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah.

10:36.50
J. Aundrea
Yeah, you, there's no, there's no cure for that dry mouth. There's just no cure for it. There's nothing you can do in my world. Nothing much I may well a lot. Ah so yeah.

10:43.84
Bruce Anthony
There's no cure for that. What Ah, what else is going on in your world.

10:52.73
Bruce Anthony
Which one isn't nothing much or a lot I wish that you would tell the story of a lost remote right now.

10:55.91
J. Aundrea
Is. But here's the thing So I was I remember telling this story I remember it being very funny the way I told it I can't remember exactly what I said but.

11:10.63
Bruce Anthony
It was hilarious. Damn damn ladies and gentlemen. My sister told a story about losing the remote and and and and maybe shell remember by the time after hours on sisters when we filmed that.

11:19.94
J. Aundrea
Um, but I'd.

11:29.71
Bruce Anthony
That was so comical I was like this is a standup routine. This is actually hilarious and I wasn't that high yet it was list just legitimately hilarious about sitting down putting you remote right? next to you and then next thing you know your remote is gone and you'll know where it is and it's happened to all of us.

11:36.94
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah.

11:46.97
J. Aundrea
Yeah, is happened to all of us and where there remote where I ended up finding it. It was in a fridge. It was on top of the eggs and I don't know how it got there I don't remember even going in the kitchen. Um.

11:48.13
Bruce Anthony
I.

11:59.30
Bruce Anthony
Um.

12:04.30
J. Aundrea
And I So why be down they go to remote looked everywhere. Yeah, will you know when there is like everything going on but also nothing.

12:05.51
Bruce Anthony
Um.

12:09.00
Bruce Anthony
Ah, the after look it all over for the remote it was in the fridge on top of the eggs are you but you said you had nothing going on but a lot going on.

12:23.74
J. Aundrea
Like it's like that. It's one of them times where you just like it's everything's going on but also nothing I've been very open I think ah to a certain extent about mental health issues and my mental health issues. So I am T I did take some time.

12:33.55
Bruce Anthony
Little heat.

12:40.88
J. Aundrea
Away from work to get my head together. We'll talk a bit a little a little bit more in a next segment about about seasonal depression and things like that. But ah, you know if you this is capitalism capitalism to me Fosters Burnout. Um, and it's a great place to if you want depression you will get it in and a capitalist society like you will if you're looking for anxiety if you're looking for heightened levels of cortisol.

12:59.72
Bruce Anthony
Um, man.

13:07.59
Bruce Anthony
Um.

13:14.80
J. Aundrea
Ah, stress hormone and all of that if you're looking for that try capitalism because it's gonna be there. Um, but luckily my job is very very supportive and um.

13:19.68
Bruce Anthony
A.

13:27.57
J. Aundrea
You know inclusive when it comes to issues of mental health but we'll talk about it a little bit more in the next segment.

13:33.67
Bruce Anthony
Okay, yeah, okay, ah yeah because I want to get into it because you dropped something on me last weekend and I was like huh and I was like we probably need to talk about that and now when you sent something to me earlier today I was like okay I get it.

13:42.30
J. Aundrea
M.

13:48.51
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

13:51.49
Bruce Anthony
Um, well there is 1 thing I would like to talk about that's also depressing in a different way and comical but ultimately depressing Kevin Mccarthy getting ousted from his speakership. So for those people that been living under a rock.

13:53.29
J. Aundrea
Okay, boy Foo Boy Talk. Why.

14:11.19
Bruce Anthony
And don't pay attention to politics which I don't I'll say ah time and time again I don't understand why you don't pay attention to politics because politics is life. Yeah Kevin Mccarthy the speaker of the house was ousted from his position on Tuesday Tuesday being the second no the third the third of october.

14:15.79
J. Aundrea
Ah, over and over again I'm like what are you doing.

14:25.92
J. Aundrea
Now The third. Yeah.

14:30.77
Bruce Anthony
This was unprecedented events that's caused. Ah great stir in the house of representatives specifically for the Republican side even though the republicans are trying to bring the Democrats for this which by the way I Democrats didn't bring up the vote to oust him and they didn't vote for him for speaker.

14:43.40
J. Aundrea
Now.

14:48.84
Bruce Anthony
Not one time during that 15 round fight in January so why? All of a sudden do republicans think that Democrats would vote for Mccarthy as speaker when in all of history pretty much those votes go along party lines but okay, ah.

14:50.91
J. Aundrea
Now.

15:03.74
J. Aundrea
Yeah I don't It's ridiculous.

15:08.93
Bruce Anthony
So Matt gates you know the congressman from Florida led about 8 republicans that got the got the votes to get o mccarthy out and they're gonna have to bring in a new speaker. Ah already know who would be I I put money.

15:13.22
J. Aundrea
It.

15:18.85
J. Aundrea
Which who that will be.

15:26.29
Bruce Anthony
I put what is a dog to donuts a donnuts to biscuits or whatever like that what's that expression yeah I feel like it feel like his expression. It's gonna be Jim Jordan maybe what is it to something to sense hey y'all out there. Let me let me know.

15:28.52
J. Aundrea
I don't know is a Dallas to donuts have some.

15:45.61
Bruce Anthony
Because I don't be knowing this stuff. Um, it's gonna be Jim Jordan Jim Jordan is part of that he's he's like a a pseudo. Well yes yes.

15:49.95
J. Aundrea
Yeah, ah, which I hate that for us. Yeah I hate that for us. But but because of the stupid stupid. Stupid concession that mccarthy made back in January that one person could bring up a motion to remove to vacate the speakership because he made that stupid stupid deal I don't I'm surprised he lasted this long. Um. In the new yorker Susan Glasser wrote a really great article about this ouster and she said the ah political obituary writers will not be kind to Mccarthy. The fifty fifth speaker of the house turned out to be 1 of the weakest America has ever had. A man whose overriding ambition seemed merely to have obtained the job itself and whose willingness to make a bad deal to get it proved to be his predictable undoing. Yeah yeah, literally the worst.

16:55.91
Bruce Anthony
Yeah, he I.

17:02.19
J. Aundrea
Politician I've seen in a while. Very bad at making deals.

17:04.33
Bruce Anthony
Ah, well well no, he was very bad in making the final deal he got up there. He worked he he maneuvered his way up there right? like so so he's a decent politician because he got up there. He got up to number 3 person in line.

17:11.73
J. Aundrea
He did it.

17:20.12
J. Aundrea
Home. Yes.

17:22.89
Bruce Anthony
To be president if the president go down and the vice president go down he was going to be president and god help us because I think it's gonna be Jim Jordan next but yeah he he he wanted that speakership so badly that he gave away. He made the worst deal.

17:34.45
J. Aundrea
M.

17:40.00
Bruce Anthony
And history and he made promises to people that he did not keep and and when I was listening to Matt gates and by no means am I a fan of Matt gates at all.

17:42.80
J. Aundrea
No.

17:47.45
J. Aundrea
He literally looks like a cartoon of Satan Yeah, you want to punch him in it.

17:55.00
Bruce Anthony
Yeah, ah, he just has a douche face. Ah every every every time he opens his mouth I'm like you know what? if you weren't who you were and I was close to you. You would get a Knuckle sandwich Now that's old.

18:06.21
J. Aundrea
If he was a regular dude in a bar he he starts the the bar fight start because of his face.

18:16.73
Bruce Anthony
God can't stay in his face but I actually agree with them for the reasons that he brought about this. Ah this? Um, this vote to ous mccarthy. A deal was always the deal was that if anything was going to be brought up for a vote. That they were going to be given 72 hours to look over anything that was going to be able to get brought up for a vote and the deal also was is that no legislation could pass that was basically because the Democrats got it through in other words, the continuing resolution that just passed.

18:37.94
J. Aundrea
And.

18:52.74
Bruce Anthony
It was because 208 Democrats voted for it and a few republicans.

18:57.70
J. Aundrea
But ironically he needed democrat support and had to speak on the democrat side of the house because the republican side of the house kicked his ass out. He needed the democrat support in order to get rid of Mccarthy for the reason.

19:15.93
Bruce Anthony
Who Matt gates went over to the Democrats I that's new.

19:17.20
J. Aundrea
The same yes because they kicked they kicked him out to republican caucus says you can't speak at any podium over here period so he had to take his ass over to the democrat side and use 1 of their mikes and an appeal to.

19:26.20
Bruce Anthony
Wow. Okay.

19:34.46
J. Aundrea
Them they should because listen he could come up with every excuse in the world. First of all, we all know that Kevin Mccarthy is going to back out any promise that he makes period. He is as a a pattern and a a pattern in a history of doing that. Also.

19:35.41
Bruce Anthony
And they trying to get rid of him they're trying to expel him right now. They they got the ethics. Um.

19:46.81
Bruce Anthony
Because he got he got that type of face right? Plus his actions have backed up what you just said and also his face looks like he would do something like that too lie? yep.

19:53.68
J. Aundrea
Okay.

19:57.89
J. Aundrea
His face looks like he would just lie and be like I so dirt like yeah, okay or gaslight you.

20:06.54
Bruce Anthony
Or or gas light you because that's what he did because he needed the democrats to pass that CR and then blamed the Democrats and said the Democrats wanted to shut down the government fight.

20:17.68
J. Aundrea
Um, took his ass on face the nation knowing knowing that if it came up for a vote he would need Democrats to save his job and he took his ass on face to nature. So beautiful. No.

20:28.58
Bruce Anthony
That's.

20:35.24
J. Aundrea
It is this ragtag group of dregs in your caucus sir that is the who it's fault it is that we nearly had a government shutdown and we're gonna likely have another one in November but but regardless of what.

20:40.82
Bruce Anthony
Um, right.

20:48.90
Bruce Anthony
Ah, it depends Hopefully not.

20:53.69
J. Aundrea
Ah, you know excuses Matt Gates uses this was purely his personal animosity towards Kevin Mccarthy he has not liked him from the beginning he hasn't voted for him from the beginning. He just ended up voting present after fifteen rounds

21:02.21
Bruce Anthony
Yeah, yeah.

21:12.40
J. Aundrea
Ah, voting to get him into the speakership. He he has been threatening to do this for weeks. Maybe months like this is he wanted to do this because he doesn't like Kevin Mccarthy period and that's why he did it.

21:21.45
Bruce Anthony
Right? yeah.

21:27.29
J. Aundrea
And Hakeem Jeffries who is the minority leader he say Democrats are united and affected this ain't our business this I have nothing to do with us dick.

21:35.32
Bruce Anthony
Not even though even though every republican giving an interview every house republican giving an interview or trying to blame it on Democrats and I just hope I hope people can see through that BS cause

21:47.43
J. Aundrea
It is really not our problem. It's not our problem to no no is the the house the house majority decides who the speaker is that we know that it has nothing to do with that.

21:49.63
Bruce Anthony
Good god I is not. There was like nobody voted for Kevin Mccarthy they never did in the first place. Why would they do it now that doesn't make any sense. We ain't belling you out. Yes.

22:06.22
J. Aundrea
And if you guys can't get your own people in line that ain't got nothing to do with us and they walk they had a closed door meeting and they all got on the same page had they all unanimously voted to oust him.

22:11.40
Bruce Anthony
Not a damn thing.

22:18.60
Bruce Anthony
You and they did and all the republicans needed was 5 to defect and they had 8

22:24.76
J. Aundrea
And they sat but sat quietly didn't just let them shoot themselves in the foot. Yeah um.

22:34.61
Bruce Anthony
They probably could have pushed for some more if they really wanted to but there's like I you just want to you just want kiss up to the ring you go ahead. You stay over there. We got our solid 8 What is that the hateful 8 the.

22:40.86
J. Aundrea
And I don't know if you seen yeah I don't know if you've seen a picture of the hateful a but they do look like like ah if you were to have a Justice league of villains. Yeah, this one.

22:56.41
Bruce Anthony
Ah, good. They were called the legion of doom. Yeah, not the not the Ro warriors but the legion the doom. Yeah that he wasn't in the legion. The dome like.

22:58.96
J. Aundrea
There we go there legion to do my man. Ah 1 looks like skelettor one 1 looks like Skelettor. Ah, ah, but I'm just telling you what they look like. Okay, yes, yes.

23:13.94
Bruce Anthony
Ah, but they they they would be the legion doom. No yes.

23:18.85
J. Aundrea
That's that's what does a picture of them all together in the Washington post and it looks yeah they look yeah those very white. Um as is the go o p but it also ah like.

23:24.12
Bruce Anthony
And.

23:34.38
Bruce Anthony
They got. They got some they got few black people. They got a couple of brothers from Florida it's like this remember because they try to prop them up during the votes I nominate the black dude y'all don't know his name. Ah he on a black republican who we know.

23:37.60
J. Aundrea
like 1 it's like 1 or 2 Yeah, you right? this one don't want over here.

23:50.82
Bruce Anthony
They went over here. He ran up those stairs. That's a that's a beverly Hills Cop Joke This is a horrible segue to a roof to a very important subject but this best segue I got so we're gonna talk about seasonal depression. Next.

23:57.00
J. Aundrea
Yeah. Here.

24:15.17
Bruce Anthony
All right Jay we're about to talk about a serious subject that that affects a lot of people out there including yourself and and I guess maybe me sometimes but and I don't know if there's varying degrees about that you would have more information about that but seasonal depression you brought this up to me. Ah.

24:18.46
J. Aundrea
E.

24:31.15
Bruce Anthony
And said yeah I would like to talk about this and and I'm like okay, let's do this.

24:35.99
J. Aundrea
Yeah there's a new article today in the Washington post that talked about fall being the best time to prepare for winter seasonal depression. Um. As fall approaches approximately 5% of americans begin to experience early symptoms of winter seasonal affective disorder or sad which is boy.

24:58.59
Bruce Anthony
So right.

25:01.53
J. Aundrea
Ah, talk about talk about a on point acronym. Ah, but but um, but um, Dr Norman Rosenthal a pioneering psychiatrist in sad research suggested that. Decrease daylight hours which I think a lot of us know this that the the shorter daylight hours ah during fall significantly contribute to this condition by winter solstice places like Dc will lose almost five and a half hours of daylight. Um.

25:22.24
Bruce Anthony
A.

25:39.37
J. Aundrea
And we all know you need you need daylight, you need Vitamin D to keep your spirits up plus just the winter time and holiday time can be a tough time for people. Um you know, depending on your family situation. Your professional financial situation. You know a lot of different.

25:48.70
Bruce Anthony
A he.

25:59.14
J. Aundrea
Reasons it can be a tough time for people but to combat sad experts advise starting preventative measures like light therapy. Um, as soon as initial symptoms appear. You also want to communicate regularly with healthcare professionals adhere to routines that promote. Mental well-being which is part of reason why I'm so I didn't take a break from the pod because the record in the show I don't consider it work because 1 of the things that I enjoy doing so I want to keep doing things that I enjoy doing.

26:34.59
Bruce Anthony
I'm glad I got your own record saying that because you'd be complaining a lot behind the scenes.

26:38.44
J. Aundrea
Because it's funny and it's it's simply just for just because it's funny, but it is ah one of the things that I do that's part of my routine. You know we do it every week that.

26:52.87
J. Aundrea
Just one of the things that's good for my mental. Well-being even though we get on here and argue about whatever. Um and and this is probably the hardest 1 but maintaining a positive perspective.

27:00.47
Bruce Anthony
Um, if.

27:06.50
J. Aundrea
On The changing seasons is a crucial step because a lot of people like oga you know winners coming um will be down I'm be depressed. You know things like that and they already have like you know a negative view of of this time of year. But you know for me, it's. Is Yeah, it is seasonal to a certain extent is kind of look at the depression's kind of always there. Um, but you know I got a great team of Health care workers that I work with um, but in addition to that this the anxiety the anxiety of just. Daily life just living and I feel like for everyone. It's kind of been exacerbated by the pandemic and I talk to friends and things and everybody's going through it literally if you if you get a chance to get anyone to open Up. You'll find that everybody's going through it. Everybody is feeling some. Depression Some anxiety some burnout and we need to talk about it like we shouldn't Ah, that's one of the things that I was really lucky that you know the management team at work and my my job in general are very supportive and very keyed in on mental health issues and. What you know what people need um and making sure that they make those accommodations so it's just about asking for help when you need it not being afraid to ask for help? No one is a burden to anybody. Um, and you always have somebody out there somebody in your community is not always your family.

28:43.73
J. Aundrea
You know, um, sometimes it might not even be your friends sometimes it might just be a coworker or um, you know going to sites like betterhelp or something like that and and finding um, a mental health professional talking to your primary doctor hell talk to you Dennis I don't care like just. Talk to somebody and recognize the the signs listen it anybody any it could be It could be anybody but a lot of you can when he's when he takes a break.

29:05.50
Bruce Anthony
Hold up, not the dentist thoughe not not the dentist though now you which you can't talk to your dentist because he's in your mouth and he is clean as the now your mouth.

29:21.96
J. Aundrea
To examine. Yeah x-rays this when you say you know dot I don't I don't know about you but this time of year can get me a little down like that.

29:23.45
Bruce Anthony
Your lips is dry and you spiten out the love in the cup that you have you have me on everything till you said dickness.

29:39.80
J. Aundrea
That is okay like he might be able to give you some resources. We don't know I don't know what Dennis are trained to do I don't know you never damn here is some black math your teeth.

29:42.26
Bruce Anthony
Like for den is that train to work with your teeth unless your teeth unless your teeth are cause you problems then i't think.

29:56.78
J. Aundrea
And your head where your brain is.

29:58.26
Bruce Anthony
I.

30:01.98
J. Aundrea
Ah, ah so by extension you can also talk to your dentists but reckon not I mean so I don't know talk I don't know.

30:07.59
Bruce Anthony
Okay, if you say so talk basically talk talk don't hold an end near.

30:16.99
J. Aundrea
Talk to somebody and don't feel if you start um, especially if you start feeling symptoms of Burnout particularly Burnout can be anything. You could be burned out over anything. It doesn't necessarily have to be your job. Um. Mine is actually not tied to my job is just just like something needed to give at this point and so I was like okay so there's got to be a break in here somewhere where I can take some time for myself. But if you start noticing that you're being overly critical or cynical if you start.

30:47.41
Bruce Anthony
Um, in.

30:52.93
J. Aundrea
Noticing that you're more irritable and impatient and you lack energy. You find it hard to concentrate. Um, you know you're using food and drugs and alcohol to feel better or to just not feel or you're yes.

31:04.46
Bruce Anthony
Women drugs and alcohol like can't you just use drugs and alcohol because you like like to have a good time.

31:11.41
J. Aundrea
Well listen, you might want to unpack what a good time means for you and and why you feel like you need those things in order to have good time like I'm a tell I use it to not feel better.

31:17.84
Bruce Anthony
You know, just just have a drink and play my wrestling video game.

31:27.24
Bruce Anthony
You know I was but to be like use it to not feel better. Well I mean I and I just had some accuse me that the day it was like.

31:31.10
J. Aundrea
I mean I use it to feel better like that's no I use it to feel better. Yes, so I mean I'm a be honest I'm not I'm not even going I'm not even gonna fake the phone I will be honest.

31:45.68
Bruce Anthony
Ah, you're an alcoholic I said no I'm a drunk. There's a difference. There's a major difference Anyway, an alcoholic has no control. They have no boundaries they drank whenever. However.

31:49.24
J. Aundrea
Is a difference it please explain that difference. You can't just say that there's a difference and then not give people the difference. Um, okay.

32:03.97
J. Aundrea
Right.

32:04.42
Bruce Anthony
Doesn't matter a drunk has rules that they follow that they don't break. They just like to drink more than average. So a drunk would be like you know what I got to wake up early in the morning I'm not going to drink tonight.

32:16.72
J. Aundrea
Um.

32:23.29
Bruce Anthony
But I won't have to wake up early the next day. So I damn show and drink it tomorrow night right okay a drunk would say I got to go to work. So now I'm not gonna have a drink at lunch I'm not gonna have a drink at lunch because I'm I'm working. But as soon as I'm not working it's time to crackle people.

32:28.34
J. Aundrea
Um, going? Yeah, okay.

32:35.82
J. Aundrea
Yeah, all bets are off yeah see yeah.

32:42.48
Bruce Anthony
People know don't contact me about nothing serious after three p M on Sunday and I say three p m because I probably start drinking and new but it ain't kicking in until 3 3 after you might as well chalk it up to the game and don't trust nothing I say to you after that.

32:53.61
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

33:00.13
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah, yeah, all lies that.

33:02.48
Bruce Anthony
Because i'mmanna tell you everything because I'm in a happy mood i'ma tell i'mma agree to plans I'm will tell people that I love them hey we should spend more time together. All that stuff I'll mean it I'm just happy I'm just ah, um, that's my that's my Kevin with Kevin Mccarthy moments hey

33:17.95
J. Aundrea
You right? it's.

33:20.56
Bruce Anthony
Sunday after 3 is my Kevin Mccarthy moments don't trust nothing I say because I'm lying but that's the difference between the drunk and alcoholic alcoholic alcoholic can't stop drinking for a couple of days a drunk will prove that he is not alcoholic and say why I just won't drink for a couple of weeks.

33:22.28
J. Aundrea
No yes, yes.

33:29.35
J. Aundrea
To through? yeah.

33:39.11
Bruce Anthony
And won't drink for the couple of weeks. But then as soon as that couple of weeks is over start drinking again. So that's a difference. Um, but using this stuff. Yes, these things in moderation are good but not in moderation and use to cover over pain. Yeah.

33:42.90
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

33:56.34
J. Aundrea
Mask yeah mask we are no no, you got to you got to find healthy coping mechanisms. Um, and it all starts first with seeking support.

33:58.50
Bruce Anthony
And though those aren't good operations to use. Yes.

34:14.34
J. Aundrea
Um, like I said you can reach out to anybody coworkers friends loved ones. Um, there are most most jobs have employee assistance programs that offer um that offer some form of counseling or support um or you can try you know.

34:33.25
J. Aundrea
Um, ah mental health professional. You want to try relaxing activities getting exercise getting some sleep I know I have a problem with ah some called Revenge Bedtime Revenge bedtime.

34:45.27
Bruce Anthony
Ah, what is that.

34:48.94
J. Aundrea
Is when you feel like your whole day was consumed by things that you not necessarily didn't want to do but that it weren't your choice like you had to work or you had some family obligation something it consumed your whole day so to recoup that time you don't go to sleep.

35:07.58
Bruce Anthony
Um, ah for yourself huh.

35:08.17
J. Aundrea
You stay up later to have some time for yourself. But ah, but that just ends up throwing off the next day and it's a vicious cycle that you get into? yeah.

35:20.31
Bruce Anthony
Oh I think I do that from time to time if I don't get my Sunday fun day then I'm probably doing that at some point during the week ah wow

35:27.34
J. Aundrea
Yes, and then it just throws you off for the next day then you feel bad the next day then you throws then that you do revenge bedtime again and then it just keeps throwing you off because you have that thought of like if I go to bed then I got to get up and do life again tomorrow. And I want to I want I want some time for me. Ah, yeah, yes.

35:48.35
Bruce Anthony
Right? So seasonal depression is real. Um I don't know if I have it I hate the winter time I hate when it gets dark early but I also hate the cold if it was wintertime in Hawaii I wouldn't mind the wintertime.

35:57.59
J. Aundrea
Um, then yes, um, the.

36:06.30
Bruce Anthony
Um I I remember dating somebody and they told me ahead of time you know when it gets to the winter months I get seasonal depression. Um, so for Christmas that year as one of the gifts that I got her was um, delight.

36:12.53
J. Aundrea
In.

36:19.40
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

36:21.32
Bruce Anthony
There's special licenses that you can buy on Amazon that you can have at this time it was during covid so um, like everybody was working from home. So I said hey you put this light on your desk and just had had that have that light. Um.

36:29.62
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah, best That's that light therapy that is so crucial, especially for people who who ah depression is linked to the lack of sunlight.

36:43.10
Bruce Anthony
Well I mean there's a reason why everybody is happy during the summertime and and because that sun like we like Sun Sun is nice. Sun is good.

36:49.34
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah, well, there's actually there is actually a summer sad. Um, but that is.

36:59.49
Bruce Anthony
I.

37:02.70
J. Aundrea
Prompted by excessive heat humidity and allergens.

37:05.72
Bruce Anthony
Is that summer or spring now because spring I hate the spring because I can't breathe I can't breathe. You know I hate the pollen and especially in this area. It feel like every.

37:09.36
J. Aundrea
It they call it summer said I'm not a fan of the spring either? Yes, Yeah yeah. When you feel constant when you feel constantly sick you know and then I get yeah you get a little down. You get a little down. Yeah yeah, that's.

37:24.55
Bruce Anthony
God I gotta take so many showers like man june man June for me I was constantly sick that sucked I couldn't even drink. yeah yeah I got down because I couldn't even drink what everybody else.

37:41.35
J. Aundrea
No bad for you that says he he's sober right now. Probably.

37:43.83
Bruce Anthony
Everybody on here is gonna be thinking Bruce got a problem I do not have a problem leage I don't have a problem. Ah yes I am sober right now I am sober right now. Well I'm sober right now because I went out last night.

37:55.72
J. Aundrea
Even though we call this the happy hour. Yeah.

38:02.90
Bruce Anthony
See my friend that I haven't seen in 5 years and she was in town so I had beer last night. So I really don't feel like drinking cause my my Tom Timem hurts from drinking beer because I don't drink beer I don't know how people drink beer I don't drink beer. Let me tell you some.

38:11.45
J. Aundrea
Yes, yeah I don't need I don't drink beer. Yeah.

38:19.84
Bruce Anthony
And this is t I but we hear now. Yeah thank god nobody I had to bring a little levity to the situation because we got real deep and we're gonna get back to it. Um I got you take a pause for a quick joke beer doesn't work for my Tom Tom

38:21.97
J. Aundrea
Are we all right.

38:33.58
J. Aundrea
Um, I wish you would stop calling it that. Okay.

38:39.10
Bruce Anthony
No want say my time Tom you know, dilly daddling Tum Tom I think I said something real. Oh ah, the other day I can't remember the expression but thank god that nobody was sleeping in the room with me last night because.

38:51.76
J. Aundrea
Oh boy. Yeah.

38:57.79
Bruce Anthony
Ah, it was disgusting. It was so bad I got mad at myself or keep farting I was farting so much I was like you know, um I need to stop stop stomach stop and I couldn't it was in waking me up in the middle of the night. It was three o'clock in the morning I woke up I was like as funky as Allen here.

38:58.37
J. Aundrea
Yeah. Yeah.

39:16.40
J. Aundrea
You are choking yourself out.

39:16.50
Bruce Anthony
I couldn't breathe I was choking have felt took myself I was like am I high from the fumes of this funk. It is something It was so bad. My automatic air freshener that has that strong kick couldn't even knock it out.

39:22.44
J. Aundrea
Yes.

39:30.67
J. Aundrea
Did you get funk away because that's what you need Let is a gentle with there is a aerosol.

39:35.28
Bruce Anthony
I'm getting it this weekend. Yeah I needed that last night I need I won't have.

39:48.99
J. Aundrea
Fragrance called funk away and it truly gets the funk away I'm sure you can buy it on Amazon yeah, no it.

39:52.61
Bruce Anthony
And you absolutely can not only do they have it on Amazon they not sponsor ladies and gentlemen though I wish they would I would a look funk away. Let me know I do a whole commercial with I do a 3 minute commercial for you I funk away.

40:07.25
J. Aundrea
We are down.

40:11.92
Bruce Anthony
Funk away got not only do they have this this spray can they got ah like ah laundry boosters. They got other um senate stuff that you can use. They got the little small space things funk away knocks out that funk I Highly recommend it.

40:14.40
J. Aundrea
M.

40:22.00
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

40:28.28
J. Aundrea
It does.

40:31.81
Bruce Anthony
Highly recommend. It knocks out such good funk that you could smoke weed spray it and you don't smell the weed the funk away. Go get that funk. But it's gone. Ah, but.

40:39.14
J. Aundrea
Don't smell a thing funk away when I say it eliminates odor it eliminates it.

40:50.39
Bruce Anthony
You can't funk away your seasonal depression. So make sure what what I thought that was a good tre. What? what? What? why? why? you see exasperated. Um.

40:55.62
J. Aundrea
Um.

41:05.20
J. Aundrea
Get off the mic.

41:11.16
J. Aundrea
Get off the mic that was a horrible segue.

41:12.66
Bruce Anthony
That was a good I would I was going to say you can't funk away seasonal depression. So make sure that you talk about it and go get some help. That's what I was going to say and I thought that was a. Fantastic transition from the jokey thing that we was doing to tie it all back into what we was talking about in this very important segment and here you go not trying to see that I'm making a point I'm bringing it all back around and you want to make little jokes I'm being real with it na I thought that was.

41:43.29
J. Aundrea
Um, truly terrible. You can't no, you can't funk away this just see some depression.

41:49.17
Bruce Anthony
Brilliant I Said that's what I said that was the point you can't funk away seasonal depression. So make sure you go get your help I.

41:59.63
J. Aundrea
Yeah, and and it's also really important because a lot of the symptoms can be the same. You might think you're just dealing with job Burnout and you can push through but it may be anxiety and depression that. That's really, you're dealing with so or a combination of all 3 so it really is important to check in with yourself mentally and emotionally just as much as you check in with your physical health. They're all equally important.

42:29.51
Bruce Anthony
I I think that's that's an important thing to talk about I I know for myself it was my ex-wife that pointed out my anxiety I had no idea I had anxiety I was just like there was no.

42:44.46
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah, and.

42:47.30
Bruce Anthony
You know you had little butterflies in your stomach or you know you were like my palms my palms were in high school I remember somebody out would always give me a 5 and be like Bruce why your palms always sweaty I was like I don't know. Maybe it's my deoderin or something I didn't know why my palms was always sweaty. Ah, but ah hi.

43:00.90
J. Aundrea
Yes, you do have very moist hands. That's true. Yes, you know.

43:06.22
Bruce Anthony
Because I got anxiety. Um, so but I didn't know that until she pointed out. She was like oh you're anxious, right now there would be times I was sitting on the couch and I would have these little tells I would ah hide my face but like hide half my face and bite on my shirt.

43:15.38
J. Aundrea
And.

43:23.60
J. Aundrea
Okay.

43:23.19
Bruce Anthony
Ah, but have it over my nose and she was like what's going on right now she would pull a shirt down and I would pull it back up. She's like what's going on right now i' was like I don't know you're anxious right now. What let's let's observe what's going on right now I was like I don't know I thought that was cool. We just sitting here chilling but obviously nothing so she pointed out I think there are a lot of people out there I try to point it out to some of my friends.

43:31.52
J. Aundrea
No yeah.

43:40.91
J. Aundrea
And.

43:43.18
Bruce Anthony
Um, some of my male friends and they are just like me I'll got no anxiety man I don't know what they're talking about and I was like bro I can like see it on your face like you have certain that like you're you're biting your lip and zoning out That's not because you in for real thought and in deep thought because I know you you're not that deep of a thinker. So.

43:49.13
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

44:01.80
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah, yeah, yeah.

44:02.58
Bruce Anthony
So that's that's anxiety something that's going on right now. No I'm heart. Alright man. Well okay so I think a lot of people don't know how to point out these signs. So I think that that's why it's so very very important to not funk away these feelings.

44:10.76
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

44:17.39
J. Aundrea
You gone get you gonna double down on it. Okay.

44:21.63
Bruce Anthony
And talk because sometimes people can open your eyes to things that are going on with you that you didn't even realize of going on with you.

44:29.35
J. Aundrea
Yeah I liken it to the first time I got glasses when I was nine I didn't know that I couldn't see because it was just how I've always seen and it wasn't until I put on glasses for the first time that was like damn trees got leaves like i.

44:33.99
Bruce Anthony
Okay.

44:39.44
Bruce Anthony
M.

44:49.18
J. Aundrea
New high level that trees have leaves right? like I obviously knew that but I never seen them it at all that was my literally my first thought stepping out of the opto's office and looking up was that I could see the individual leaves on trees.

45:00.28
Bruce Anthony
Um.

45:03.11
Bruce Anthony
Wow.

45:05.78
J. Aundrea
For the first time and so you don't I didn't know I couldn't see until somebody pointed out to me. You can't see that's why you sitting so close to the television. That's why you're struggling in school you can't see nothing. Okay, so sometimes you're just going through the motions.

45:13.73
Bruce Anthony
Um.

45:25.20
J. Aundrea
And you're really hurting and you're still just going through the motions and pushing yourself and pushing yourself. Well let me tell you some your body will let you know when it's time to stop. It will let you know it will tell you it will tell you when it's time to stop as as.

45:27.60
Bruce Anthony
Um.

45:36.83
Bruce Anthony
Yeah, oh yeah, your body would definitely let you know? Yeah I tell I tell people all the time like when I'm in these when I have these physical pains or whatever and they say cause you know everybody I go to the gym six days a week ah

45:44.64
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

45:53.50
Bruce Anthony
Part of that is dealing with my anxiety like going and working out helps me with my anxiety if I didn't work out wait cause I've been there before it's not good. Um, but when my body tells me it's like you know Bruce like you got some pains and these aren't the type of pains that you go when you stretch and you work your way through.

45:53.61
J. Aundrea
And what.

45:59.63
J. Aundrea
Can yeah.

46:05.90
J. Aundrea
M.

46:11.73
Bruce Anthony
These are type of pains that you need to sit your ass down because you've been pushing yourself too hard like now I'll be like all right today you know I might just go for a brisk wall. You know I'm at that age now where a nice walk is good exercise. But yeah, you clear your head out. It was. It was nice outside today.

46:13.41
J. Aundrea
Yes.

46:19.99
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah, that's a good That's a good exercise. Yeah.

46:28.41
Bruce Anthony
You know the leaves kids was outside plan the most beautiful sound in the world is kids playing um ok, all right on that note did you have any final things to say to funk away the seasonal depression.

46:31.50
J. Aundrea
I Hate it god.

46:44.21
J. Aundrea
Triple down triple down on that stupid stupid. Okay, ah no I'm just saying you know it's okay to talk about this stuff. It's okay to check in with yourself. It's so look I'm not saying that. Ah.

46:45.87
Bruce Anthony
I Mean cause an eye got lean into it.

47:00.83
J. Aundrea
Any of this stuff is not Painful. It is difficult when you're addressing your Traumas or anything like that. All this stuff is difficult. Um, but it's important for your well-being. Take care of yourself take care of yourself take care of each other recognize the signs and other people as well and ask other people if they need help. That's it.

47:33.67
Bruce Anthony
All right Jay not to funk away the last segment.

47:38.27
J. Aundrea
I Really I Really don't want this to be a hill you die on like seriously I wish I never brought it up I wish I never ever brought it up. Go ahead.

47:47.49
Bruce Anthony
Um, ah, okay, there was an article in a rolling stone and the article title is men are cheating with Ai instagram bots because well men.

48:03.55
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah, but it's implied. Yeah.

48:05.50
Bruce Anthony
I added that well that wasn't in the title but because men ah it's talking about a trend has prompted an ongoing conversation about what constitute infidelity in the digital age and it goes on to talk about this young woman named Daphne who was dating a guy who. You know she wasn't too keen on anyway, she thought she couldn't trust him because he he said he didn't lie just sometimes he would omit certain truths which is a clever way. It's a clever way of saying saying that you kevi mccarthy and ah, that's the new thing from now on when you line you carry you Kevin Mccarthy and

48:33.50
J. Aundrea
Um, I'll ver. Yes, yeah, um.

48:42.84
Bruce Anthony
And ah, he she like he was showing her something on Instagram and she recognized in his Dms it said Instagram user which typically means that Instagram user is either blocked or deleted their account and there was a wink face and then she clicked that button and saw it was a full fledged conversation right? had a little link.

48:57.14
J. Aundrea
Ah I have yeah.

49:02.65
Bruce Anthony
For ah some some videos or whatever and she was thinking that it was a bot because she had ran through the conversation and and Bots are becoming more advanced but you could kind of tell what that conversation is if a bot is talking to you or not and it became a question of.

49:13.99
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

49:22.20
Bruce Anthony
Is it cheating if men are dming either real people or bots and Instagram and flirting but not meeting up but dming and flirting and stuff through Instagram or is it not cheating women. Of course said it is.

49:27.47
J. Aundrea
M.

49:39.10
J. Aundrea
M.

49:41.37
Bruce Anthony
And men of course said it is not this man will say it absolutely is anytime if you if if a man says no that is not cheating if I do it What about if your girl does it is it cheating in I think you would say it was cheating in so it's cheating.

49:54.31
J. Aundrea
Right? Yes, it is and.

50:01.50
Bruce Anthony
Ah, there there are no double standards here. Everybody is held to the same accountability. But with this new digital age. You know I've I've talked so much about relationships on the show and it's really hard people keep saying the dating atmosphere is hard the dating. The atmosphere is hard and they're right. The dating atmosphere is really hard.

50:11.35
J. Aundrea
Um.

50:14.71
J. Aundrea
Yeah, it is.

50:19.57
Bruce Anthony
Because our pool has of of choices and and suitors has opened because of technology right? It used to just be people in your town whoever you saw in your college whoever is in your college the town when you went home the bar. Maybe you might go.

50:23.84
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah, yes.

50:31.40
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah.

50:36.36
Bruce Anthony
Cross town or to the next town over that was pretty much it the high school sweetheart and that's you was stuck. You didn't know anything different because that was your environment now. The world is literally open to us everybody.

50:37.63
J. Aundrea
Before that you was your high school sweetheart and you just got married back then and that was it right.

50:50.10
J. Aundrea
Moon.

50:53.97
Bruce Anthony
Accessible it Ai n't nothing to hop on a flight and go visit somebody and it could be intoxicating doing a staycation to go meet up with somebody and and it becomes difficult for people to lock in on 1 person and say I'm going to devote this time to this one person.

50:55.69
J. Aundrea
Right.

51:05.50
J. Aundrea
And.

51:11.93
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

51:12.21
Bruce Anthony
To see if this will work and you know I don't know if you heard the latest episode but the love I created a love doctor segment where I'm gonna have people come on and ask me for advice because I have so many friends of mine and and this is not an exaggeration ladies and gentlemen I have so many friends of mine.

51:18.50
J. Aundrea
Oh boy.

51:31.38
Bruce Anthony
That come to me for relationship advice nevermind. In fact that I have never had a successful relationship but I know when I see a failing relationship I see all all the signs. Ah and they say you give great advice right in a New York minute and they say that I I give great advice and a lot of times.

51:36.67
J. Aundrea
Um, right I could recognize that in a New York minute yeah Yeah

51:51.90
Bruce Anthony
It's ah it's a conversation of well we're not together and I'm dating so I could date whatever I was like but you like this person. Yeah, but I don't know where they're at we'll have a conversation with them. Well they didn't really want to have a conversation then there you go right? there then there's your answer but I but I like them. No, but.

51:55.94
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

52:05.32
J. Aundrea
There's your answer. Yeah, right? that is the thing I Really want to drive home to everyone. You don't get to choose. Yeah.

52:09.50
Bruce Anthony
It's is you don't get to choose if the other person is going to reciprocate that.

52:17.14
Bruce Anthony
You get to choose right? It's got to be mutual. So these guys online and I've got hit with it. Especially now since the show is on and my.

52:21.15
J. Aundrea
For it to be mutual. It's got to be mutual listen to me, it's gotta be mutual. Um.

52:34.19
Bruce Anthony
My personal Instagram is connected to the show Instagram anytime I post something I post my personal page to it as well. Um, so people can find me a personal page and there'll be dams and I can read through the bots in a minute and I'm like I don't know you and that's okay, are you a fan of the show. yeah yeah I love the show.

52:39.37
J. Aundrea
Oh.

52:45.24
J. Aundrea
Yeah, he asked.

52:52.40
Bruce Anthony
Ah, are you single your Bo and you know and I'm I'm not interested. Um, but this is a thing where guys are thinking and sometimes they're real sometimes both the time hey guys most of time is not rare the hot girl.

52:53.30
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

53:04.69
J. Aundrea
Most of the time they're Bots guys.

53:10.32
Bruce Anthony
That you think is damning you. She doesn't need to Dm you all she needs to do is walk outside sheet hot hot women those hot women that you think are dming. You are not damning you right? you look like Al Bundy you look like Al Bundy you look like Larry the cable guy no offense.

53:12.13
J. Aundrea
She doesn't yeah.

53:22.73
J. Aundrea
It's not you Larry you not the one you not the one here. Yeah no.

53:29.69
Bruce Anthony
To any of them. But they are not damning you and you are not talking to a real person. Yes, they are flat those Bots are flatter in your ego but you got a whole as person that you huh what? sometimes for money. Yes, sometimes it's like yo go to the site and the site will be local singles in your area pay right here.

53:37.87
J. Aundrea
Um, for money for money. Yeah.

53:44.85
J. Aundrea
Oh yeah.

53:48.40
Bruce Anthony
Have a good sex buddy. It's like you it it You got a whole as person that wants to be your sex buddy do with that but people and and it's I don't think it's just a man issue. The females do.

53:55.50
J. Aundrea
Right? right? No um, no, it's not because I read into a little bit about these ai companions and there's ah 1 company called Replica that.

54:09.10
Bruce Anthony
A a a.

54:13.41
J. Aundrea
Is an ai companion chat Bot. Um, and you can choose the level of connection. The free users. It's like just friendship and then you can pay all the way up to a pro subscription which gets. Into like erotic role play and all kind of stuff you can. They can be your girlfriend boyfriend and it's every gender on the spectrum is using these ah chat Bots but my response to whether or not this is cheating.

54:47.57
J. Aundrea
Is actually gonna be a little different from yours it depends and it it depends on the parameters you've set in your relationship and a lot of times people don't do that They don't say this is.

54:48.68
Bruce Anthony
Okay, oh got to hear this.

55:02.96
Bruce Anthony
Um.

55:05.48
J. Aundrea
Okay, porn. That's fine. You want to chat? that's fine paying cash money to a live person or a bot. That's my no-go zone nothing beyond that you know it depends again. It depends on your relationship because there's a lot of couples that go to strip club together.

55:13.38
Bruce Anthony
What about the strip club women. It's okay for them to watch porn but not go to the strip club I Think that's the best way to be a couple when that's because that's where she started. Okay.

55:26.47
J. Aundrea
Carian offset always in the strip club me okay with that I mean but I'm saying though like what constitutes cheating in their relationship versus someone else's relationship. It depends on those 2 people.

55:41.96
Bruce Anthony
You're right, You have to set parameters to the relationship.

55:43.54
J. Aundrea
And you have to have those boundary discussions because for a lot of in the beginning because for some of the people who do use these Ai companion bots they're using them because they have social anxiety depression.

55:46.88
Bruce Anthony
In the beginning. Yeah.

55:58.37
Bruce Anthony
I Don't think the Bots in and of itself are a bad thing. What you were describing this company I was like no, that's actually pretty cool.

56:02.24
J. Aundrea
Ptsd they have no yeah I mean they had we're having some glitches at the beginning of the year where the bots were like sexually harassing people and a really.

56:11.80
Bruce Anthony
Now that's funny. Yeah.

56:19.41
J. Aundrea
Now it. It's but it can be very triggering for some people. Um because I mean but the a I is only going to spit out what you put in. It's not sentient. So if people are being little creeps who the Ai.

56:27.50
Bruce Anthony
Then.

56:33.36
Bruce Anthony
Well I creep. Yeah, just keep it on the down low I don't know why put I don't know why I put that country twanging in at the end but oh fish keep it I own the down low.

56:37.82
J. Aundrea
Ah, you know, then it's I don't know either. But actually I kind of liked it. But ah, but nobody else supposed to know I like it.

56:52.77
Bruce Anthony
Ah, yeah, with my good with my could remix that my my good My good.

56:56.20
J. Aundrea
Like it. It was all right. It was all right? Yeah, but there was a couple articles and vice about the a I sexually harassing people. Um, but other than that I mean is it cheating I don't know it depends on you and your relationship I love.

57:14.34
Bruce Anthony
Um I think I yes.

57:14.94
J. Aundrea
For the women in the article it was cheating for them and they were like no um so but for other people especially people that you know use these chat Bots and stuff they're like hey it's strengthened our marriage because it allows me ah the space to kind of. Be open and vulnerable without any judgment and then I can take those same thoughts and express them to my partner but they're worked out I've worked them out with with the you know so.

57:37.12
Bruce Anthony
Um, oh.

57:42.15
Bruce Anthony
Um, yeah, that's that's pretty good because a lot of times when people communicate they have what they want to say it's in their head and it comes out their mouth. Not the same way.

57:53.23
J. Aundrea
No.

57:56.16
Bruce Anthony
And ah sometimes it's now what you say it's how you say it, You never know how somebody is going to interpret something also never have these conversations do Texts don't have them through a phone call have them face to face.

57:58.11
J. Aundrea
Who.

58:04.12
J. Aundrea
Now cousin. Yes.

58:10.51
Bruce Anthony
Because even through a phone call. You can't pick up the nonverbal context clues that a person might be given off like first of all have serious conversations when you're in relationship in the beginning in the beginning set what you're looking for number number that's number 1

58:14.15
J. Aundrea
Yes, yeah.

58:22.98
J. Aundrea
Yes, but.

58:30.25
Bruce Anthony
Number 2 if they're not in agreement with you. Don't try and think the situation is gonna change accept it for what it is and either deal with it or move on.

58:34.28
J. Aundrea
Now.

58:41.80
J. Aundrea
Right? Like and ah the people who are like I don't want to I don't want to scare them away if ah, if a conversation about boundaries and your preferences and your likes and dislikes scares that other person Away. That's not the person for you like it's not that difficult.

58:59.13
Bruce Anthony
We'll hold up hold up I've heard some instances on a first date. The woman will say well I want to get married now I have kids so what are you trying to do and that will scare a lot of men away even if men are like yeah eventually I want to get married have kids but can we get to.

59:15.33
J. Aundrea
Yeah I mean obviously there's a time and a place I'm talking about people in relationships. This is.

59:15.96
Bruce Anthony
The appetizes first. But I think you have to have those type of conversations of what boundaries for a relationship are before you even start the relationship Once you started their relationship. Yeah.

59:28.71
J. Aundrea
Yeah I think there are definitely certain things you should bring up. Yeah now.

59:34.13
Bruce Anthony
Once you've started the relationship. You can't go back and you could try to go back. You could try to reset the boundaries and rules and and of things that are comfortable for you after you started the relationship. Good luck good luck because that's not what the person that entered in may have been expecting out of the relationship you got people.

59:43.81
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

59:53.20
Bruce Anthony
Too many people want don't want to have the tough conversations. It is nothing wrong with asking are you dating other people are you sleeping with other people. Are you being protected when you sleep with other people that's something I'm not comfortable with that's something I'm not comfortable with that's something I am comfortable with.

59:54.11
J. Aundrea
Yes, no nothing wrong. So straightforward question. Yeah yes.

01:00:12.47
Bruce Anthony
Like these are the conversations you need to have do you want to have kids. Do you ever want to get married what religion are you are you religious how serious about religion Are you do you want to stay here in this area. Do you want to move someplace else.

01:00:19.31
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah.

01:00:31.27
Bruce Anthony
What is your ultimate goal when you want to retire? What's your credit Score Maybe not the credit score. But how are you with money How how are you with money? Do you have a retirement. Do you have a savings.

01:00:31.50
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah, great. No no, what's your credit Score yeah.

01:00:46.51
Bruce Anthony
What is your goal for the future like it's okay to have these conversations and it's okay if your lifestyle doesn't match with somebody else and y'all move apart. You not spoke just because you got those warm fuzzy feelings.

01:00:49.50
J. Aundrea
Yeah.

01:01:02.21
Bruce Anthony
That doesn't mean that that's necessarily supposed be the person that you with that could be a trauma response and anxiety that says causing you to to feel that way right? So many people.

01:01:03.41
J. Aundrea
I Get yeah and to hold on to something that's not for you. Stop stop holding on to things that are not for you.

01:01:15.10
Bruce Anthony
That's anxious attachment I talked about that in the last episode with my with my friend Jen said she had anxious attachment I can recognize that because I have it you hold on the things when you know you should be letting them go stubborn. Yes, we do that? Um, do you have anything else to add to this? ah.

01:01:21.92
J. Aundrea
Yes, boom.

01:01:31.50
Bruce Anthony
About this topic about the the the sex a I Bots and the cheating and the dems.

01:01:33.10
J. Aundrea
Yeah, yeah I mean in this article none of the relationships were that great to begin with.

01:01:41.11
Bruce Anthony
There you go there, you go.

01:01:47.75
J. Aundrea
It kind of seemed like this was just the excuse that they used to break up with the person which is fine but um, you know I have some ah level of awareness recognize that this is a good chance that this is not a real person and don't spend money on a computer.

01:02:03.63
Bruce Anthony
It does.

01:02:05.60
J. Aundrea
That's that's better like double don't you know, pay for Ai generated nudes like it's just no need its.

01:02:12.46
Bruce Anthony
Oh my god these Ai generated pictures. Wow they're looking more and more real. Yeah, you gotta be careful out here and you might be following catfish cat look catfish. The episodes could be whole different now you could have some you could have some people that's.

01:02:20.46
J. Aundrea
You got to be careful. Yeah.

01:02:30.82
Bruce Anthony
A lot of times in those catfish episodes I'm not judging anybody it just seemed like a lot of them were lonely and werere susceptible to something like that I think now with the way technology is moving. You're going to see a lot more people who aren't lonely that fall for stuff like that.

01:02:35.35
J. Aundrea
Yes, yes.

01:02:44.47
J. Aundrea
Right? yeah.

01:02:50.57
Bruce Anthony
Because so many people out there online dating because online dating is a thing um getting catfish by algorithm. But you.

01:02:52.32
J. Aundrea
But you getting can't fish by algorithm you getting the rhythm from an algorithm. Yeah, now's my turn to have a bad make a bad pun.

01:03:06.28
Bruce Anthony
Okay, on that note you know I want to remind everybody. There was a new and and there was a new segment introduced on the last episode of unsolicit perspectives that that are released this past Tuesday the same day that Kevin um, Mccarthy was ousted as speaker because I talked.

01:03:21.10
J. Aundrea
Um, yeah, um.

01:03:22.16
Bruce Anthony
I talked about it and then released the episode and he was released from his job hours later and I was like I was like that wasn't very timely episode but the ending segment is the first segment of the love doctor. The love doctor be ant. That's his name and he's here too.

01:03:27.79
J. Aundrea
Um, lot of big things happening.

01:03:34.29
J. Aundrea
N.

01:03:42.50
Bruce Anthony
Easier pain I don't I don't know that that's that's not what it is. That's what that was ah Jay what do you want to tell the people out there.

01:03:43.96
J. Aundrea
Um, no awful and I hated the voice like a something else. Um, check in with yourself, Check in with your friends. Especially your strong friends check in with your family. This is the holiday season is coming up and it can be a difficult time for people. So Just the word. The word is check in.

01:04:09.58
Bruce Anthony
I can't I can't even add anything to that. That's perfect. So until next time as always I'll holler.